What It Means to Have Faith In Someone

One morning, Soryu’s assistant told me that he wanted to talk to me in the big cabin some distance away from the main building we call “HQ”. This was highly unusual, as I was (and still am) a monastic residential trainee not involved in senior leadership affairs, often discussed there.

After I arrived, to start the conversation, he asked if I knew why he called me. Not assuming anything, I said "No." He replied it was a good answer, then got straight to the point—recently I had behaved in a way that could have a serious negative impact on our community.

At the time, I had recently been delegated the role of Care while the usual Care person was away. The main job of this role is to care for the community. As we clarified the behavior and how it was unhelpful, and how severe the consequences might be if it continued, I became concerned.

I asked, “Does this mean I don’t have enough judgment to be in this role?”

“If we didn’t think you have enough good judgment, we wouldn’t have asked you to do it. But this does add to the question. It’s evidence of a lack of care for the community, so that’s added to a lot of other things.”

“What do you mean by ‘other things’?”

“We’ve had thousands, tens of thousands of experiences with you. That would also be included. Sometimes you’re diligent and self-sacrificing, and other times you’re more self-involved. Everyone except arhats is like this. We’d include all of your choices in such a decision. This is one more that would be added. Okay?”

I was so astounded that I could only utter a tentative “Sure”.